Enough with the Andersons Already!

Once again the spotlight is on Hollywood and their shoddy performance in the field of human resources. This time round the general criticism is focused on the fact that the industry is currently employing far too many film directors named Anderson.

“It’s an absurd situation” said Joanie Novak a Hollywood reporter “You go to rent a whimsical movie about a pair of innocent kids running away to live in the forest but instead of quirky boyscouts and nostalgic decor, you end up with aliens slicing each others’ faces off or oil barons bludgeoning each other to death.”  

To remedy this situation, the American Association of Filmmakers will require all the directors named Anderson to draw straws. The long straw gets to keep his name and the others will have to choose a new family name for themselves. “But for Christ’s sake, just chose a normal one.” adds Novak. “Don’t go inventing a daft surname with the letters you randomly picked out of a scrabble bag. I mean looked what happened to that stupid git M. Night Anderson.”