Embarassing Feats of Memory
I called my friend K, who I was sure was also at her desk, pretending to work:
After this little discovery, we started keeping a list of all the embarassing crap songs that we secretly knew the lyrics to. And it's real quite the list ... but I wanted to open this one up to the floor ... what is the most embarassing song you actually know the words to? Give us a shout in the comments section ..."Hello?"
(intoned in my best country singer tenor)
"Ev’ryone considered him the coward of the county.
He’d never stood one single time to prove the county wrong.
His mama named him Tommy, but the folks just called him yellow.
Something always told me they were reading Tommy wrong ..."
"Um .. okay ..."
"How is it possible?? How can I know the lyrics to 'The Coward of the County'? I don't even like that song. Surely everytime it's come on a radio that I was listening to, I changed the channel ... and yet, I'm sure I know all the lyrics ... how? How is this possible??"
"Mac Arthur's Park is melting in the dark,
all the sweet green icing flowing down.
Someone left the cake out in the rain.
I don't think that I can take it,
'cause it took so long to bake it,
and I'll never have that recipe again,
Oh, nooo!"
"Yes, exactly ... how is this possible??"etc.
posted by Lung the Elder | 8:15 pm
8 Comments:
Think of you working up an appetite ,
Looking forward to a little Afternoon Delight,
Rubbing sticks and stones together make the sparks ignite,
And the thought of rubbing you is getting so exciting ...
Skyrockets in flight
Afternoon Delight
Remember ONE – look for a safe place,
TWO – don’t hurry, stop and wait,
THREE – look all around and listen,
Before you cross the road. Remember,
FOUR – let all the traffic pass you,
FIVE –then walking straight across. You –
SIX- keep watching. That’s the Safe Cross Code.
We learned it in school in Ireland and it was always blaring on the TV on Saturday mornings. It will be lodged annoyingly in my brain until the day I go belly-up under a wreath. On the other hand, I’ve yet to be hit by a car, so maybe there’s something to be said for advertising drills.
To anyone Irish and over thirty reading this – Suffer Baby! Suffer!
" God save our gracious Queen,
Muff
Every bloody ABBA song, ever.
You name it, I know hundreds. And hundreds. "Afternoon Delight;" "Seasons In The Sun," "Horse With No Name," "D-I-V-O-R-C-E," etc.
Goodbye papa it's hard to die
When all the birds are singing in the sky...and all the children laugh and play...little children come my way...
Goodbye Michelle my little one/You showed me how to laugh and find the sun/We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun, but the hills that we climbed were
just seasons out of time
Goodbye papa please pray for me
I was the black sheep of the family
You tried to teach me right from wrong/Too much wine and too much song wonder how I got along
Lately it's been horrible children's music...
"Your so vain. You probably think this song is about you, don't you"
every once in a while, the words to a church song from the wacky cult my family was in will pop into my head :
"people of god
it is time to arise
and proclaim to the nations
we're not going to die...."
the horror that fills me upon realizing what's going through my head is akin to someone telling me i'm exactly like my mother.
sooooo many...growing up, my brother and I would howl at the injustice of listening to K108 FM, my parents' station of choice. Later, I described this sound as "no loud noises or startling movements." So just to pick something, I'll say...
"Everyone considered him,
The coward of the county,
He’d never stood one single time,
to prove the county wrong."
Go Kenny Rogers! You will live on in my wretched memory, you awful hack.
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